Friday, April 7, 2006
1:01 AM
No new information on Cupcake. We have heard we might be able to get some news/photos from the current agency trip, but as much as I would love to see and hear more about her, it's okay if it doesn't happen. I'm still very delicately holding on to the idea of having received and accepted a referral, and this adoption is happening. I'm not ready to fully claim it- I'm too scared. Terrified, actually. It seems so fragile and unreal. I tiptoe around it, the idea of it.
But I have shown her pictures to anyone who cares to see them- I carry them with me constantly, and proudly show them off. Mention "baby", "infant", or "adoption" to me, and I whip out the photos with a big stupid grin.
I'm sort of concerned for a lot of my friends who are adopting right now- many of them are switching agencies (which I think is a really good thing, especially if it makes THEM feel better and it makes their adoption go faster) but many of them have to stay with their current agencies for one reason or another. I think a lot of the agencies haven't developed their programs as fast as they hoped, and a lot of families were able to get their papers ready FASTER than anyone expected. I constantly hope and pray that all the agencies with waiting families get licensed, and my friends' children can come home soon. I'm also hoping that the China program speeds up soon- the slow down has been horrible to watch and hear about, and I can only imagine how the DTC families are doing right now. I hope the time zips by, or things speed up.
This is heartbreaking stuff, adoption. But also a complete joy- goes from one extreme to the other.
