Tuesday, March 7, 2006
9:37 AM
Well, we got in touch with the BCIS, and they needed three forms- a tax return, some sort of permission to photocopy thing (?), and a request for legal proof of Tom's name change. The first two are easy, the last one is involving a bit of research. We made it clear to the BCIS that we would go to court RIGHT NOW and get the stuff we need for that, but they've asked us to hold off so they can do research. In Florida, it's legal that a man can change his name during marriage, the same as a woman can, without going to court. So BCIS wants to figure it out with us because they think that there might be more couples in the future in a similar situation. They promised it wouldn't hold up our file, and at least the woman in charge of it all *knows* us now, and knows our name and file. At least, that's how I am trying to think of it!
In this past week I tried to catch up on "real world" stuff that I sort of abandoned when we started this adoption. I sort of thought if I walked away from the computer, the news might come. The ol' "watched pot never boils" theory. I lurked around all my favorite journals, though. I can't give *that* up! Let me just say that I'm still incredibly behind in real world stuff. But at least I got my hands dirty, and my work table is once again filled with things in progress rather than being empty and clean. I need to mail out a few orders, start seriously on my spring collection.
Today was supposed to be referral day. We've had a few of these in the last month, but they were mostly hinted at. This is the first definite date that our agency told us to circle on our calendar. Apparently there is a staff member that returned from Vietnam on Sunday with not only updated photos and health files for the families who have already received a referral, but new referrals for some of the other families. We're in the latter group.
Unfortunately, it looks like the staff member still has not returned, so it will be a few more days. I am completely and utterly raw inside from this. Yesterday was the worst day so far- I vacillated between wanting to cry and wanting to vomit all day. For the first time, I dreamed of adoption all night. I guess it's sort of a relief to know it's not coming today instead of hoping all day, but still... I wish I could just turn it off for a few days. Because I know people will ask today, and I just don't feel like saying "not yet. Maybe later."
I feel horrible writing this, though. I know some of you have been waiting a VERY long time for your own referral, so four months is cake. When I say that I honestly wish that you guys could get your referral, or finally travel to bring home the child you have been matched with, I mean it.
This waiting business is completely sucktastic. But I have the very best people with me in this waiting room ;)
